Straight From the Mouth of Memoirist Terese Luikens

 

The Inspiration Behind A Heart's Journey to Forgiveness

By Terese Luikens

The Inspiration Behind A Heart's Journey to Forgiveness

I was thirteen when my father ended his life by suicide. Back in the 1970s, suicide was not a topic families openly talked about and for that reason, my mother’s explanation to me about my father’s death went like this;

“Your father is dead.”

“How?”

“His heart just stopped.”

Her explanation for his death left me with a load of suspicion and finding out the truth became paramount to me. As the sixth of seven kids, I knew from experience that the older siblings always knew more than me. But, if I asked an older sister for the truth, I knew she would tell me. Indeed she did, yet her honesty left me reeling in confusion. 

Even though my siblings and I shared the same tragedy, we did not share our grief. We didn’t know how to comfort each other, let alone talk about a topic no one else wanted to talk about. 

None of the adults in our lives came to our aid. No one showed or told us that it was okay to be sad, that confusion was normal and that we might even feel angry.  In essence, we were left to ourselves to sort through our emotions and find our own way to survive. 

After I married and became a mom it seemed like the right time to begin understanding the grief I’d never understood, to face what I’d only tried to ignore and to put some order to the chaos in my mind. 

As a result, I began journaling and talking with a few trusted friends. Over the years, I began to understand some of the events that led to my father’s death by suicide, my mother’s silence and my inability to grieve.  

Finally, I gained enough courage to join a writer’s group and began sharing my story in small bits and pieces. With their encouragement, I finally wrote the whole story and with their help polished it and sent if off to Redemption Press. 

Redemption Press is a publishing company that offers independent publishing services with the project management style of a traditional publisher.

 

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Terese Luikens has been married for forty-four years to the same man, although she is on her third wedding ring, having lost one and worn out another. She lives in Sandpoint, Idaho, enjoys being mother to three grown sons and grandmother to her much-loved grandchildren. She is the author of A Heart’s Journey to Forgiveness, a Memoir of her inspiring journey of emotional healing from her father’s suicide. She facilitates retreats and workshops focusing on forgiveness, and publishes her own blog, Why Bother? 

You can visit her website at www.tereseluikens.com.